Why A Summer Romance Is Overrated.
Hello Lovlies. I'm Jordan Nicole :) I don't know about you but I have been exposed to the idea of a summer romance since before I was old enough to even understand what romance was. The summer fling can be seen everywhere from movies to television to books. It feels like every summer when I look for a fun, silly YA book to put me in the summer mood I browse through nothing but an endless string of books about summer romances.
So where did the romanticized view of summer flings originate? Was it brought on by a generation of young girls watching Grease and wishing that they could go spend the summer on a beach finding their Danny Zuko? Is it the idea of the endless days and nights, uninterrupted by school and responsibilities, that you can spend with this person? Maybe it is the fantasy of going to a place where no one knows you and completely reinventing yourself, while also finding love along the way?
Whatever the reason behind the fascination is, it is definitely an established dream that society puts into young girl's heads. I know that I spent every summer reading books about girls who got to spend their summer at some distant relatives beach house and who, because of this location, found the love of their life... or at least of that summer. I would read these books and wish that some day I could be that girl. Unfortunately for teenage me, I lived hours away from the nearest beach and my parents weren't all that eager to ship me off somewhere for the summer. At the time the idea was so appealing. Actually, the idea seemed pretty appealing all the way through my first few years of college. Those were the years when I was still so desperate to find love. Being alone seemed like the worst fate, and spending the summers alone was simply tragic.
Looking back on those years with the perspective I have gained in my 22 years, I have NO IDEA what I was thinking. I can only blame my fantasizing on the way summer romances were portrayed in the media around me. The truth of the matter is that there is no direct correlation between having a fun, life changing summer and being in a relationship. In fact I have spent all but one of my summers completely single, and I would almost argue that those were some of my most valuable growing experiences.
The summer is a time when you are unregulated by school and schedules. The days feel endless and the nights are filled with adventure. I have spent the majority of my summers running freely. I have had nothing to hold me back. No restrictions, besides the ones set by my parents of course. The feeling of sunshine and freedom is one that can not be replaced. There is something about the heat and the rays of sun hitting your skin that make everything seem magical. I have made some of my best memories in the summertime, and I made those memories completely alone. Well, single at least. I was typically far from alone, as I take this time as an opportunity to surround myself with friends.
I know that being in a relationship during the summer does not ruin it by any means, but it also gives you something that ultimately ties you down. You can't run freely with your friends and flirt endlessly with the boys across the pool. You can't take a family trip to the beach without wishing your SO were with you. Spending the summer being single frees not only your schedule, but your mind. You won't be worrying about what trouble that SO of yours is getting into at camp or off on that road trip with their friends.
I wasted so many of my summers dreaming of being on a beach somewhere and having a guy to fill my time with. While I am still spending this summer wishing I was on a beach, I have outgrown the desire to fill my time with a boy.
I don't need a boy to make my summer amazing. I really don't need a boy to make any part of my life amazing. So if you have been spending summer after summer wishing that there was someone to call your summer fling while the summer passed you by, then I say let's all leave our dream world's this summer and embrace all of the adventurous and freeing things we can do in a summer, even without that summer love.
Besides, if you did have a summer love then you would have to spend your whole summer dreading the day that you had to leave them and go back to the real world. Being single means that you can enjoy all of the magic of summer without fearing its end!
So where did the romanticized view of summer flings originate? Was it brought on by a generation of young girls watching Grease and wishing that they could go spend the summer on a beach finding their Danny Zuko? Is it the idea of the endless days and nights, uninterrupted by school and responsibilities, that you can spend with this person? Maybe it is the fantasy of going to a place where no one knows you and completely reinventing yourself, while also finding love along the way?
Whatever the reason behind the fascination is, it is definitely an established dream that society puts into young girl's heads. I know that I spent every summer reading books about girls who got to spend their summer at some distant relatives beach house and who, because of this location, found the love of their life... or at least of that summer. I would read these books and wish that some day I could be that girl. Unfortunately for teenage me, I lived hours away from the nearest beach and my parents weren't all that eager to ship me off somewhere for the summer. At the time the idea was so appealing. Actually, the idea seemed pretty appealing all the way through my first few years of college. Those were the years when I was still so desperate to find love. Being alone seemed like the worst fate, and spending the summers alone was simply tragic.
Looking back on those years with the perspective I have gained in my 22 years, I have NO IDEA what I was thinking. I can only blame my fantasizing on the way summer romances were portrayed in the media around me. The truth of the matter is that there is no direct correlation between having a fun, life changing summer and being in a relationship. In fact I have spent all but one of my summers completely single, and I would almost argue that those were some of my most valuable growing experiences.
The summer is a time when you are unregulated by school and schedules. The days feel endless and the nights are filled with adventure. I have spent the majority of my summers running freely. I have had nothing to hold me back. No restrictions, besides the ones set by my parents of course. The feeling of sunshine and freedom is one that can not be replaced. There is something about the heat and the rays of sun hitting your skin that make everything seem magical. I have made some of my best memories in the summertime, and I made those memories completely alone. Well, single at least. I was typically far from alone, as I take this time as an opportunity to surround myself with friends.
I know that being in a relationship during the summer does not ruin it by any means, but it also gives you something that ultimately ties you down. You can't run freely with your friends and flirt endlessly with the boys across the pool. You can't take a family trip to the beach without wishing your SO were with you. Spending the summer being single frees not only your schedule, but your mind. You won't be worrying about what trouble that SO of yours is getting into at camp or off on that road trip with their friends.
I wasted so many of my summers dreaming of being on a beach somewhere and having a guy to fill my time with. While I am still spending this summer wishing I was on a beach, I have outgrown the desire to fill my time with a boy.
I don't need a boy to make my summer amazing. I really don't need a boy to make any part of my life amazing. So if you have been spending summer after summer wishing that there was someone to call your summer fling while the summer passed you by, then I say let's all leave our dream world's this summer and embrace all of the adventurous and freeing things we can do in a summer, even without that summer love.
Besides, if you did have a summer love then you would have to spend your whole summer dreading the day that you had to leave them and go back to the real world. Being single means that you can enjoy all of the magic of summer without fearing its end!
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